Bro, let me tell you.
Exams? They’re not tests.
They’re emotional rollercoasters, character development arcs, and full-blown Bollywood tragedies — all rolled into 3-hour torture sessions sponsored by the education system 🥲
So here's my official guide to the 7 Stages of Exam Grief.
Spoiler: No healing. Just chaos. 😂
Stage 1: Ignorance Is Bliss 🧘♂️
“Exams are next week? Chalo, we'll see.”
I'm out here vibing, scrolling reels, drinking chai, and convincing myself that I still have "plenty of time".
Notes? Never heard of her.
Syllabus? Sounds optional.
At this point, I’m 97% chill, 3% stupid.
> Meme Mood: That dog in the burning room: "This is fine." ☕🔥
Stage 2: Sudden Panic Attack 😱
“Bro... it’s in 3 days?!”
Out of nowhere, the realisation hits harder than Indian moms when you forget to bring dhaniya from the market.
- I start checking the syllabus.
- It’s 82 chapters.
- I’ve opened 0.
Brain: “Let’s start with the index.”
> Reaction: Me at 2 AM staring at the textbook like it’s the Rosetta Stone.
👁👄👁
Stage 3: Overconfidence Phase 😌📚
“Okay okay, I’ll study full night. Easy.”
- I make a study plan so fancy it could be framed in an art gallery.
- Buy highlighters. Arrange desk.
- Open book.
3 mins later: "Let me just check one meme for motivation..."
Suddenly it's 4 hours later and I’ve memorized 24 memes, 3 zodiac posts, and 0 syllabus.
> Meme Moment: Me pretending to study with open book and YouTube playing lofi music for vibes. 🎧📖
Stage 4: Bargaining With God 🙏
"Bhagwan ji, bas pass kara do. Promise I’ll study from day 1 next sem."
I start chanting everything from Hanuman Chalisa to “Om Jai Jagdish Hare” hoping divine intervention will download the syllabus straight into my brain.
Also lighting agarbatti next to my notes for spiritual Bluetooth connection.
> Mood: I am not studying. I’m manifesting. 😌🔮
Stage 5: Existential Crisis 🫠
"Why am I like this?"
- I start questioning everything.
- Why did I choose this course?
- Who even made the education system?
- What is life?
- Will I ever find love or just backlogs?
I write one answer and check the time. 5 mins gone.
I blink again. Boom. 45 mins gone.
> Meme Reaction: “Is this paper even from our syllabus?” 😭
Stage 6: Last-Minute Hustle 🔥
Now it's do or die. I become full scientist.
- Solving past papers. Drinking 8 cups of coffee.
- Asking toppers for notes.
- Googling: "important 10 marks questions for lazy students."
Brain at 3 AM: “You remember that meme from 2017?”
Me: “Shut up and focus!”
Also me: Opens Instagram for 2 mins. Ends up watching cats dancing to dhol beats. 🐱🥁
Stage 7: Acceptance (aka Giving Up) 🛌
“Jo hoga dekha jayega.”
I enter the exam hall like a freedom fighter walking to battle.
- Pen in hand.
- Confidence in air.
- Preparation? Questionable.
I write some answers. I write some poetry.
Even drew a diagram that may or may not be from Class 8 biology.
When I submit the paper — I smile. Not because I did well.
But because it’s finally over.
> Final Mood: “Result jo bhi ho, bhindi khana toh padega.”
Moral of the story?
- Start early.
- Study smart.
- But let’s be real — we’ll repeat the same thing next semester anyway.
Because what's life without a little academic trauma and a lot of memes?
Tag a friend who's currently in Stage 4.
Or 5.
Or all of them at once. 😭