Brooo 😩
Lemme tell you something tragic...
I sat down to study.
Just sat. Didn't even open the book.
And next thing I know – 7 hours gone, my Wi-Fi plan over, and I now know how penguins propose 😐🐧💍
So here's a list of life-changing lessons I learned while not studying for my internal exams:
1. YouTube Recommendations Are More Loyal Than Friends
I searched “Photosynthesis explained” 🌱
And now I’m watching:
"What if humans had dog ears?"
Like, HOW DID WE GET HERE? 😭
But low-key... I learned a lot. Like… dogs can hear earthquakes before they happen.
So if my results cause a natural disaster, my neighbour’s Labrador will know first. 👍
> Me to my books: I’m not ignoring you, I’m just scared of commitment.
2. Instagram Reels Are Black Holes in HD
I opened Insta to “take 5-minute break” 😇
Next thing I know:
- Watched 37 reels
- Followed 3 dog accounts
- Learned how to make Korean garlic bread (???)
And my brain is now playing that “Who is she? She’s stunning” audio on loop.
> 📢 My reaction:
“Mummy, mujhe kuch yaad nahi aa raha, mujhe Himalaya bhej do!!” 🧘♂️
3. Everything Becomes Interesting... Except the Syllabus
- Mom’s scolding suddenly sounds philosophical 🧠
- That one cobweb on the ceiling becomes the plot of a horror movie
- Even the neighbour’s baby crying has more emotional range than my chemistry teacher
At this point, I can write thesis on:
> “Cultural Impact of Indian Pressure Cookers and Their Morning Whistles” 😵💫💥
4. Self-Motivation is a SCAM
I tried everything:
- Studying with lo-fi music (felt like I'm in a sad movie montage)
- Pomodoro technique (I just ate tomatoes instead 🍅)
- Making aesthetic notes (took 2 hours to write the title)
By the end, my motivation was on leave, and even my pen was like:
> “I resign. Tumse na ho payega.” 😭✒️
> 💀 My Reaction:
Me looking at my untouched syllabus at 2am:
"Main kya karu, job chhod du?"
5. I Have a Degree in Overthinking Now
Instead of studying, I ended up:
- Rethinking all my life decisions
- Wondering if dinosaurs had feelings
- Googling “Can you survive exam with pure confidence?”
Spoiler: You cannot. 🫠
> 🧠 My Reaction:
When someone says, "Exams toh easy hi hain na":
Trust broken. Friendship cancelled. Blocked.
BONUS: My Brain's Activity Chart During Exam Season
The Ironic Moral of the Story:
You’ll learn everything except the actual syllabus.
But hey, at least I now know how sloths poop only once a week. 🦥💩
(Which is still more productive than me this week.)
Final Words:
If you're reading this instead of studying...
Bro, same. Let's open the book together at 11:59pm. 📚⏰
(IST – Indian Student Time 😭)